A Letter Home
by Fendo
Summary: Throughout the quest to stop Alduin, and even before, the group has to do something to keep themselves together in such desperate times. This includes, often, writing home to the ones they left behind. Mean that what it may. A series of letters from the Dovahkiin and her group of travelers to their loved ones, mainly from Naelin (Dovahkiin).
1. A Letter Home

in which Naelin writes a letter home to her brother, Filgan, before she sets off to High Hrothgar to meet with the Greybeards.

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Sundas, 11th of Rain's Hand, 4E201

Dear brother,

Hey, Fil. I'm sorry its been so long, been on the move a lot lately. I know I said I'd write more, but we both know how bad I am at remembering to keep up with this. I've got no real excuse, not going to lie.

I'm glad you and mother are doing alright, but she really needs to get her act together. She's running the two of you into the ground, and like always it has to be you who picks up the slack. She's lucky you're so good at what you do, and keeping you two afloat, otherwise we'd all be in a pretty shitty place. Tell her I said to get her ass in gear.

And hey, say hi to everyone for me? I'm really missing you bunch right now. I'm lucky I have Fralia, the old woman who's giving me a place to stay for the time being – I'm really in need of someone to lean on right now. I'll get to that in a moment. Oh yeah, I'm staying in Whiterun at the moment, but by the time you get this who knows where I'll be.

And heeyyy, how are you and Miltha getting along, hmm? Since it's been a while since you wrote me I'm going to assume you actually made a move by now. I want details, mister.

But, there's another reason I finally decided to write back – other than just keeping in touch, of course. You're not going to believe me, I'm sure.

Dragons, Fil. I'm sure the rumors have spread by now, and you're thinking it's impossible and just made up but no, it's _real_ , Fil. I was there, I saw it myself. They're huge and terrifying and can level entire towns. One already did, and that one looked like hell itself. Damn near got myself killed. Twice. _Don't_ freak out.

We don't know how, we don't know how many, but they're _back_. I thought it was just a legend. We all did. I'd lose my shit over this if it weren't so horrifying. But somehow this shitstorm is even worse than that – I'm involved in this. And I don't mean I'm responsible, hell no. They keep popping up where I am – it's already happened twice. You could say it's coincidence, and I damn well want to, but it sure as hell doesn't feel like it. And after what happened recently…

I killed one, Fil. Well, not just me, but that doesn't matter. The… the life-force, the _soul_ … I felt something. There was blue light and the body burned to ashes right in front of me, and the light came straight for me – it went _into_ me. I nearly dropped dead on the spot out of shock. Then something echos across the sky, yelling "Dovahkiin" so loud it almost felt like it came from inside my head. I know, right?

The Jarl says it's the Greybeards. Dragon Tongue speakers. Says they called for me across the land, from High Hrothgar. All the guards are calling me "Dragonborn." I feel almost sick writing this. I don't know what any of this means, but I'm scared. Something huge is going on and I feel like I've somehow been thrown into the middle of it.

I'm setting out for Ivarstead tomorrow, then to High Hrothgar. Jarl says I have to, and I can't exactly say 'no' to the man ruling the city I'm living in currently – and I can't leave this alone, either. This is too much for me to ignore, and it might help explain the thrumming in my head and whatever the hell happened a few days ago. Maybe it has to do with that damn wall I found in the old Barrow…

Don't ask about that. Explored a ruin, found a wall with some weird language on it, same weird blue light. My head was killing me for hours afterward. That asshole dunmer I found in there wasn't much help either. Don't ask about that either.

I know this is a lot to take in, believe me, but maybe don't tell the others about this for now. It doesn't make much sense to anyone on my end (not that I've met yet), don't go yammering to everyone about how your sister is being possessed by dragons or something.

I think I'll have to start writing back more, and I mean it this time. I have a feeling things are about to get real crazy for me… And I know it's too much to ask of you, but don't get too worried over me. Even though I just gave you a ton to worry about. Stuff that I'm worrying about. But don't go nuts if I don't write back in a while or take a lot of time. Cause I do that a lot anyway, but I think I'm gonna have a lot to take in pretty soon. I'm gonna need time. Time that I'm likely not gonna have.

Listen to me, sounding all deep for a second there. Seriously, I'll be fine. Keep mother on her feet, and keep your head on straight. I'll write if anything big happens again.

Take care,

Naelin.

* * *

*authors note: again, the dunmer she refers to is my OC Drelas, whom Naelin meets during her ransacking of Bleakfalls, a few weeks after she denies the quest to retrieve the Dragonstone - not Arvel the Swift, who has the Golden Claw. though, this may be retconned later due to me reworking some things atm.


	2. A Tear Stained Letter

in which Drelas writes a letter home to his parents, informing them of the death of his twin brother. it doesnt end well…

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Tirdas, 19th of Mid Year, 4E200

Dear mother and father,

I deeply regret to inform you, that my dear brother has sadly left us. Another student, whose name I will not include, attempted to preform a very dangerous and ill thought out experiment, of which Casvin was sadly a victim of, in his effort to protect a fellow student from harm. The incident has been ruled a complete accident, and the student has profusely apologized and has been expelled from the College.

He passed peacefully, just yesterday night. I am very sorry for not informing you of the accident immediately, but I was preoccupied and unable to sort my thoughts into an appropriate letter. Additionally, I knew that the letter would not reach you before anything was concluded, and didn't wish to worry you if he recovered in the mean time.

But he hasn't. He's gone, and so I send you this.

… It pains me, very deeply. I was able to do nothing – the healers were unable to undo the effects on time, and I could just watch. I saw him die. I held his hand as I saw the light fade from his eyes and his weak hands fell limp. I cannot tell if I'm burning inside, or if I'm frozen. I feel cold. But my heart feels... I'm not sure. Gross. Wrong. Raging. Gone.

What am I supposed to do? Casvin has always been there, ever since we were born, and now it's just me. That wasn't supposed to happen. We were supposed to learn together. HE was supposed to become so great, greater than I ever could be. HE was the one who wanted to come here so badly, HE was the one who insisted on this, HIM, not ME. No one was supposed to die.

The bastard who did this... I want to hate him. For doing this to me. To him. Taking Casvin away from me, from us, is unforgivable. I hope the bastard burns.

No... No, Casvin wouldn't want that. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry that I'm still unable to control myself, that I couldn't do anything as Casvin died in my arms. I can barely go into our chambers anymore. I'm writing this from the library, and Urag has left me to this, and even locked the doors to everyone else. I'm grateful for that.

A service honoring him will be held tomorrow, though people have been mourning him for a few days now – ever since it happened. We want to preserve the body and have it returned, but necromancy and the like are obviously banned here, and no preservatives are available. Not enough for a whole body. So he will be traditionally burned here, and the ashes will be returned home to you, soon after this letter has reached you.

I don't think I can stay here. I know you, and Casvin, would want me to, but... It hurts too much. I miss home, if you'll believe it. I was never supposed to be alone. This was his dream, more than mine. If anyone should have died that day, it was me. No. I'm sorry. He wouldn't want that either. But I can't help thinking it.

I can't write anymore. I'm sorry that this is the final version of the letter you'll receive, but I've run out of parchment to write a new one, so this will have to do. I will try. I am trying - to stay, that is. But I don't have very high hopes for it.

I wish I could say more. I love you, and I'm sorry again. That's all I really can say.

Your son, Drelas R'lo.


	3. A Stressed Letter

in which Naelin writes home to her brother before traveling to Kynesgrove, to meet again with Delphine and fight the dragon Sahloknir.

* * *

Dear Filgan,

Alright, you remember all that "Dragonborn," freaky dragon stuff I told you about in my last letter? Well, it turns out I was right and it's all true. I met with the Greybeards, after damn near freezing my ass of mind you, and they confirmed it. Told it to my face; you're the Dragonborn. Dovahkiin, whatever.

I think I can remember you knowing something about the legends, but I'll explain this to you anyway in case you've forgotten. Basically, I have the soul of a dragon, and I'm able to learn and use "shouts" as dragons do much easier than any other person on the planet. It's told I'm supposed to save the world, from that hell-dragon I mentioned, who's named Alduin. Nordic God of Destruction and The World Eater. It's insane, I know. I'll give you a bit since I'm sure you're going nuts right now.

Okay, so yes, this is destiny's way of saying "You're chosen" or something, and also "fuck you."

I've had some time to come to terms with this, and that's the only reason this sounds anywhere near coherent or sensible. And thinking about it, it actually makes a lot of sense to me. Helps explain a lot of little things over the years. The intense yearning to fly, my power-challenging against mother and you, the want of wealth for as long as I've known what it is, the feeling that I'm too large inside for my body... It all makes a bit more sense, don't you think? Maybe I'm just making excuses, I don't know.

Also, big thing here, we have a theory on how the dragons are coming back. A new contact says she thinks it has something to do with the Thalmor, and that they're not coming back from some other place, they're being brought back to life. Crazy jump there, but with the evidence she's shown me, and everything _else_ that's happened recently, I'm willing to consider it.

And you're worried, I know. You're probably terrified right now and trying not to blow a gasket. I can't really ask you not to at this point, I did the same. Hell, I'm still like that now. But, though I can't say I have this under control, I'm working on it. The Greybeards are on my side, and I'll be returning to them soon enough, and believe it or not I've supposedly got the Blades working with me as well. I thought they were wiped out, honestly. They've been on the real down-low, though I've only met one of them so far. Can't say I'm completely sold, but we'll see.

I've got a traveling companion, too. Don't worry about him, he's a good guy. An orc by the name of Mull, met him on my way to the Greybeards, and he helped me out on my way to get something for them. That I still haven't gotten yet, but I'll get back to you on that. He's a great fighter and I honestly don't think he has any ulterior motives in this – he didn't even charge much at all for the initial employment. I don't see him trying anything, since I know you'll worry about that, too.

But, here's the big part. I'm intentionally going to challenge a dragon. I'll wait while you scream for a moment. Yes, "It's insane! It's too dangerous! You'll die, you stupid little girl!" but hear me out. If this whole Dragonborn thing is legit, it's going to happen inevitably, and more than just once. I have to do this, whether I like it or not. That, and the Blade won't actually help me much unless I prove it to her. So it's a way of making sure for both of us.

I'm not happy about this, trust me. In fact I'm downright pissed and dreading it. But there's not much way around it. And no, I won't be doing it alone. I'll have the Blade and Mull with me, so I think we've got a chance. I've fought one before, remember?

So, I guess I wanted to write you in case I like, die and stuff. Hopefully that won't happen but, this _is_ a dragon after all. It'll already done and over with by the time you get this, but I guess pray for me. I'll write you real soon afterward, too. Promise.

Oh, and I guess you could tell some people about this now, if you want to. Not that I don't think you've probably already said something to mother at this point – you always did have a hard time keeping your mouth shut sometimes. If I'm gonna die on some insane quest to save the world I'd at least like some people back home to know about it. And hey, if I live, you guys can cheer me on from there.

We're heading out tomorrow, to a small settlement near Windhelm called Kynesgrove. The Dragon should be there, and then we'll go from there. I know it's hard for you to write back to me, since I'm on the move more than ever now and finding me is difficult, but I'd like to get proof that you're actually getting these, if you could manage it...

Wish me luck, I love you,

Naelin.

* * *

*no longer including dates on these since i dont have my timeline 100% ironed out and i dont want to have to edit these later.

[EDIT ANYWAY] fixed the part discussing how the dragons are returning! i havent actually played the game in over a year so i got my facts a bit jumbled there. playing it again now though and its all good now.


	4. A Rushed Letter

new segment; review responses!

 **chas:** " _Nobody gives a fuck about your stupid characters;_ " yeah thats real fuckin neato bud

* * *

in which Naelin quickly writes a short letter to Filgan after defeating Sahloknir to let him know she's alive.

* * *

Dear Filgan,

As I'm sure you've guessed by now, I'm alive! You can get some actual sleep now, I hope.

Sorry for worrying you like that, and since I know it'll be a bit until you get this, sorry for making you wait so long to hear from me. I'm sure you were worried to tears, and I can't say I didn't expect that or that I blame you. But I'm okay. A little scuffed up, but still breathing, so I think that's a victory.

Now, there are a few real important things I got to tell you. not that there haven't been in my last couple letters, but whatever. First, we were wrong about the Thalmor, we think. I personally don't know a whole ton about them, so I can't say 100% either way. Whether or not they're involved, the biggest player in the dragons returning is Alduin - big shock there. The three of us saw him resurrecting one when we got to Kynesgrove. Dragon/God magic is insanely powerful, as it turns out. So, that answers that.

Second, the Blade is willing to work with me now, since she saw me absorb a dragon soul firsthand. It's weird, thinking that's happened (again)... feels really odd, kinda draining, and strangely empowering. It is a dragon soul, I mean. Big stuff.

Third, remember that asshole dunmer I mentioned? Guess who we ran into on the way. Name's Drelas, kind of a grump and pretty rough around the edges. But, he helped us defeat the dragon - turns out he's a pretty strong battle Mage - and so I have yet another traveling companion now. Not sure how long he'll actually stick around (he seems the lone wolf type), but he rushed to help when he thought we were gonna die. I guess he's not that bad.

We're heading back to Riverwood now to discuss more with the Blade, should be there in a day or so. Other than the whole dragon thing, not much else. Just wanted to let you know I was safe. I can keep my promises, see?

Naelin.


End file.
